I love working at LJS

Most of what I do at the Lincoln Journal Star is business over the phone. Usually, it follows a formula: The customer calls, I take their classified ad, I get payment from them, repeat. Occasionally, I get some really interesting calls.

This is a synopsis of one conversation I had with a lady today:

ME: "Journal Star Classifieds, this is Gray"

LADY: "Hello, my name is ______ and I have received a REVELATION. "

ME: "Ummm... ok"

LADY: "I have received a revelation from the Lord. He told me that every child in the Lincoln Public Schools needs to say the Lord's prayer at 8:00 on Halloween. This is what the Lord said, Children need to know the Lord's prayer and he wants them to say it on Halloween. If this happens, then we can prevent all of the "Woes" spoken of in the book of Revelation. You see, I believe that I am the INCARNATE EVE. In the garden, It was not Adam who was tempted. It was Eve who was tempted, and...."

ME: (Interrupting) "Umm...Ma'am. I'm sorry but did you want to place a Classified Ad."

LADY: (hesitating) Well, how much would it cost me to put this in the paper.

ME: Well, that depends. When did you want this to run.

LADY: It needs to go in tomorrow. We need to get it in there. Children only have 3 weeks to learn the Lord's prayer before halloween. (Then launches back into the prophecy again.)

ME: Well, for an announcement like this, we have to run it on our regular rates. One day will be $28.96. Would you like to place the Ad?

LADY: I will need to consult Gen____ (some name that started with a "G" or a "J"...it sounded to me like it was some kind of spirit guide or angel). I will find out if she wants to run it and call you back.

ME: Ok, thanks, bye.

Times have changed since Isaiah and Jeremiah were prophets. Now prophecy works through mass communication...and it operates on a budget.

Super Market Discussion

I was surprised by an interesting conversation that I overheard among 4 grocery store workers as I was checking out at Russ' Market last night around 10:00. There was some talk about the book of Revelation that I did not quite catch then I heard one of the guys say "I'm just gonna be sitting around playing Johnny Cash songs on the harmonica when the rapture happens...then everyone around will dissappear."

How random is that. It was clear that they were being derogatory about some person who had tried to convince them to get saved before the end times. I don't think that they have a very solid eschatological approach to life...but at least they don't believe in the rapture.

Cell phone spirituality

I got a ridiculously funny text message last night when I was hanging out with some people at The Mill. The message said this:

Say this slowly "God I love U & I need U!" send this to 10 ppl & a miracle will happen 2nite. Ignore it and everything will go wrong!

I ignored it and everything seems to be fine so far. I read the message out loud and everyone laughed. It was from some unknown Mississippi number (go figure). I tend to get pretty annoyed with any form of media as a means to share the gospel, although I'm sure God has used it. My favorite story is when I received one of those Christian email forwards that told some emotional and unbelievable stories. Then at the end of the message it said something like this:

Send this to as many people as you possibly can!!! If Jesus had been alive when we had email, he would definitely have used it to spread His name.

WOW. I can't even begin to list all the problems with that.